There are so many reasons to give the dire Do No Harm various Spurious Awards (lead actor Stephen Pasquale was a contender for expression of week in both of the two episodes that actually made it to air – see below). But the real stand-out was for a moment of unbelievably unconvincing child psychology. Okay, so the little girl has a parasite in her brain:
“Do you know what Dr Cole is going to be doing today?” asks insipid female doctor.
“He’s going to cut a worm out of my brain,” replies little girl.
“It’s called an Echinococcus multilocularis,” insists insipid female doctor.
Dr Cole and little girl look at each other, laugh and re-iterate, “A worm…”
It’s funny, y’see, because the little girl can’t get her tongue around “Echinococcus multilocularis” and so the kindly male doctor has cleverly simplified it to, “You have worm in your head.” Ho, ho, ho…
That’ll presumably be comic writer Marv Wolfman and comic artist George Perez they’ll be referencing then, in Arrow.
Headline Of The Week
Is that a subtle dig at The Daily Mail (which blames everything on the unemployed)? Or The Sunday Express (which manages to find a royal angle to nearly everything?). The back page sports headline is ironic, too, in the week that it was announced Being Human was coming to an end. If the fans had had their say, we’re sure it would have been, “This show is bloody brilliant at the moment – don’t cancel it!”
We were slightly concerned when headlines started popping up all over the internet announcing that arch-ranter Kevin Smith was weighing in on the Disneyfication of Star Wars, especially as many of those headlines used the word “commodification”. Oh dear, we though, here we go again. More moaning about Darth Mickey plush toys. But instead, Smith introduced a bit of sanity into the argument: “You can’t call it the commodification of Star Wars because the creator himself first commodified Star Wars a long, long time ago in a decade far, far away with toys and bed sheets and inflatable lightsabers. Star Wars has always been big business. It’s a roller-coaster ride in a theme park: thrilling, fun and good for repeat business. And as you leave the ride, you’re compelled to buy a T-shirt and snow globe memento. Disney paid billions for Star Wars, but with the JJ news and now this subsequent info about the spin-off flicks, they’re gonna make double what they paid in the first 10 years alone. After that, the financial Force will be with them. Always.”
Even better, he put this idea in our heads: “Grouse though [fans] may that it’s not ‘their Star Wars’, every old-school fan will line up to see a Yoda origin story, or to see David Boreanaz as a young Han Solo winning the Millennium Falcon from Donald Glover’s baby-faced Lando Calrissian (Yeah, I’m calling it here!).” Yep, we’re going to be disappointed by anybody else now!
The Franchise The Just Won’t Die Of The Week
The show was cancelled 11 years ago, yet it’s still popular enough to spawn this. One day, it will return, oh yes… one day. (Oddly, you never see any new Charmed games at Toy Fair… and that lasted eight blimmin’ seasons – grumble, grumble, grumble!)
Mash-Up Of The Week
Game Of Thrones meets Downton Abbey… we kid you not. Pianist Sagar Jethani makes the link.
Fashion Statement Of The Week
The cybermen have discovered a new way of subtly replacing human bodies part. “You will cook like us. You will sauté for us.” At least you get to keep your head so you can taste what you’re cooking. Available from the BBC Shop.
Can you identify the Marvel heroes and villains for these initial-themed clues. Interestingly, designer Mike BaBoon has made all the heroes capital letters, and all the villains lower case letters, which must be a metaphor for something (cough – small penis – cough*). (*Female villains have metaphorical small penises, okay?)
Valentine’s Video Of The Week
Some geeks will do anything to get a snog.
Reimagining Of The Week
There have been loads of Pixar/Disney mash-ups on the net over the past couple of years, but we have to admit, these are some of our favourites. They were created by Phil Postma tons more here!
Meme Bandwagon Jumping Of The Week
Sorry… but how could we ignore Harlem Shake, which has taken over YouTube while Spurious Awards has been on hiatus? And amazingly for an internet meme, a lot of them are actually quite amusing. Well, we say that this week…