SFX Spurious Awards

Self-assembly Doctor Who, cheapskate Sanctuary, leaky knights, truthful posters and loads more spurious stuff

MEN WILL BE MEN OF THE WEEK
“My men are marking the territory,” says Arthur in this week’s Camelot. And look, they’ve taken their own lampposts with them.

BUSHTUCKER TRIAL OF THE WEEK
Chuck, Sarah and Casey decide they definitely want to get out of here…

SERIAL CHEAPSKATES OF THE WEEK
Sanctuary has never exactly been the most lavishly-budgeted show in the world, but its recent run of episodes has taken cash-strapped to a whole new level. Sure, when it came back from its midseason hiatus it kicked off with a costly looking conclusion to a two-parter (set in a hollow Earth, with massive CG cities, giant monsters and a cast that numbered, ooh, a dozen maybe?). But since then it looks like they’ve been trying to make up for an overspend by using every penny-pinching trick in the TV book. Three bottle episodes in a row, set predominantly (in one case entirely) in the Sanctuary with few if any guest stars. Surely they’d saved enough to splash out on the next episode? But no. It got worse this week, as they resorted to that TV trope that reeks of desperation like a fading comedian on Celebrity Big Brother – the flashback episode. What’s the plot next week? Will and Magnus stuck in a lift?

RUBBISH CPR OF THE WEEK
Or possibly ever. On Doctor Who, after Rory nearly drowned, Amy didn’t pinch his nose so all the air she breathed into him would’ve come straight out again. And she didn’t even tilt his head back, so the air could’ve gone into his stomach instead of his lungs! And the compressions were… random. And surely the Doctor would have had some decent resuscitation gizmos in the TARDIS? We think they both secretly wanted him to pop his clogs again to see how he’d come back this time. How many times has he croaked so far?

ZZ TOP IMPRESSION OF THE WEEK
Or maybe Ian McKellen is vying for a role in Psychoville.

AMERICAN DREAM OF THE WEEK
You just know this was what was really going through their minds… (posted on http://i.imgur.com).

UNLIKELIST SOURCE OF A LEAK OF THE WEEK
And no, we’re not back on the subject of Camelot knights. This is a different kind of leak. Seems that the software studio behind Total War could be developing a game based on the Alien films. And how do we know this? Because the Government Minister for Communication, Culture and the Creative Industries, Ed Vaizey, visited the company for a presentation, and then Tweeted, “Great visit to Creative Assembly one of UK’s best developers. Now hiring for new blockbuster based on Alien.” Who needs WikiLeaks?

PENITANT OF THE WEEK
Steven Moffat caused a bit of a media storm this week, slamming internet spoilermongers using such heated phrases as “vandalism”, “I hate them” and, erm, “twit”. But you probably heard about all that anyway. What you might have missed was his later amusing Tweet in which he admitted he may have gone a little bit too far (yeah, Moffat, twit was a really low blow… how could you?): “Finally heard my own rant. Grumpy sod. And what a boring, inflection-free voice! It’s like been told off by the shipping forecast.” He also pointed out: “It’s the fans who MAKE the screenings – helluva lot of people to punish for one idiot.”

REIMAGINING OF THE WEEK
What that classic Fantastic Four #1 would have look like in the Mr Men universe, courtesy of Look What I Drawed, the illustrated blog of Paul Shinn.

PERSONALISATION OF THE WEEK
The Twitter Fail Whale with a Star Wars twist, courtesy of Le Kemp.

CORRECTION OF THE WEEK
From the New York Times.

FLATPACK OF THE WEEK
College Humour does it again. And there are loads more where this one came from.

THE TRUTH OF THE WEEK
What if movie posters told the truth? That’s what TheShiznit.co.uk has been pondering as they doctored some of the posters for this year’s blockbusters. Here are just a few of the ones with an SF/fantasy flavour; there are loads more on the site, including a Harry Potter one that made us laugh out loud, but has a very naughty word on it.